I sit here completely broken yet so perfect at the same time.
Another year of my life has passed and my birthday is almost here. With
each birthday, life becomes clearer. My mission becomes clearer.
At least this year I know why I was put on this planet (to inspire). I’ve
been blessed with some major highs that have shown me just what is possible if
I believe in myself. Now, it’s not just me that believes. That belief has
reached well beyond anything I could have ever imagined.
Truth be told, I’ve had the biggest years of low’s in my entire adult
life (10 years). These lows have defined my comeback.
I’m no longer going to hide from what I really think. I have learnt a lot
from the past years.
Here are a
few lessons you can use in your own life too:
1. We
can’t be inspirational all the time
For some reason I come across a good friend, daughter and always there
for others. I’m expected to always be inspiring. The truth is some days I don’t
feel like being inspiring, and that’s okay. You can’t always be on. Some days
you will be off. You’ll hate yourself, you’ll be lonely, you’ll be unmotivated
and that’s okay.
2. Give to
yourself once in a while
You can’t only give all of your talents to the world and never leave
anything left for yourself. Sometimes you need to give yourself the following:
– Forgiveness. Messing up is guaranteed. Don’t be too hard on yourself
– Time. Low points in your life take time to get over. Give yourself that
time.
– Knowledge. Break the mould once in a while and learn a new skill. Do
something that scares the hell out of you.
3. Make
new friends
Perhaps your current friends are what are holding you back. Maybe it’s
time to make some new friends and get access to new experiences. One thing that
has always helped me develop is to surround myself with people who think the
same as me but do life differently. Some of them I watch closely and enhance
the way they approach life in my own.
My definition of success always looked a certain way until I met people
who had a totally different view of success. Our lives are often made up of
ideas and goals we borrowed from other people. The more people you have around
you that are positive, the more ideas you have to borrow.
4. Wear
your heart on your sleeve
I’ve always believed you should do the opposite of the majority. That’s
why I believe you should wear your heart on your sleeve. Say what you think and
communicate how you feel. You’ll be surprised how much people appreciate this
compared to the fakery that goes on day to day.
5. Success
is seriously messed up
I’ve met a lot of people this who are obsessed with success. Normally I
would love this but what I realized is that this so-called phenomenon has gone
wrong for many people. Success is not about achieving all the time and being
selfishly always about you.
As you mature, you realize that we have to go beyond ourselves. We have
to care for other people. We have to contribute something meaningful to the
world. After a while, being obsessed with a pursuit such as business can become
overwhelmingly unfulfilling.
“Being successful is about having people who care about you, having
someone to love and being dedicated to a mission that is far greater than you.
All the money, sexual partners, fancy parties, degrees and nice clothes can’t
do this for you”
6. Invest
Invest in the stock market
Invest in yourself
Invest in business, personal and romantic relationships
7. It’s
okay not to be okay
There are going to be times in your life where it feels like you’ve just
been hit by lightning. You are going to have times when you are not okay even
if you are mega successful. It’s okay not to be okay.
Nobody is on cloud nine all the time even though we are often tricked
into comparing our lives to others.
8. The
people you admire can often be in a dark place
I’ve been lucky enough to lift the curtain on some of the people I
admire. I learned that many of them are not as they seem. Many of them have
either come from a dark place or are in a dark place right now. As humans,
we’re fantastic actors.
We act out what we want others to believe about us because to be
vulnerable and ask for help hurts our ego.
Focus on spending your time living your life and growing each day. Forget
about comparing yourself to everyone else because chances are many of them are
not who you think they are. People live in dark places all the time and you’ll
never truly know who they really are.
At the same time, ensure you don’t go to that dark place yourself. Step
into the light even during the hardest times in your life. Try to make sense of
the events that happen to you which hurt like hell.
“Know that there is an empowering meaning for everything even if you
can’t see it right now”
9. Your
happiness starts with you
We’re all chasing the happy drug. What I’ve learned over the last year is
that happiness starts with me. I have to stop having so many rules and
expectation that make it impossible for me to be happy.
Think about your own happiness. Are you trying to reach some crazy
definition of happiness that can’t possibly be fulfilled? Strip away the layers
just like an onion. Try and simplify what you define as happiness. You’re in
control of the ship and you can be happy with you if you let yourself.
10. Focus
is the winning formula
Our attention is being brought and sold at every second. The moment we
try and do anything, chances are, we have to use a device connected to the
internet. As soon as we turn to our phone or tablet, there are a hundred
distractions right in front of us.
By watching successful people, I’ve seen that focusing on one thing is
the winning formula.
Our lives
are already complicated enough and if you can’t find a way to divert your
attention into the handful of things that matter to you, you’re unlikely ever
to do anything that can be defined as success.
11. Ideas
come from the weirdest places
To fuel your life, you need ideas. Ideas can come from everywhere and so
you have to be consistently doing the following:
– Reading
– Listening to podcasts
– Watching documentaries
– Being curious
– Going to new places
– Attending events
Some of my best ideas have come from all these well-known activities.
Open your mind and get out there and do stuff. If you don’t know what to do
with your life or what your mission is, the answer is you need ideas. Then, you
obviously need to take action on a few of them.
12. We’ll
all find love
It may take time, but we will all find love at some point in our life.
The key is not to give up and try and be patient. Having said that being
patient is hard (I should know as a single woman). When the time is right you’ll
find what you have always dreamt of and all the waiting will be worth it.
Don’t close your heart or tell yourself that love doesn’t exist for you.
It does. Loves exists for everyone and you are worthy.
“Keep doing the reps towards your love goal just like you would in
the gym”
13. Try
not to judge
I find myself judging people without even knowing it. Not because I’m
judgemental, but because people around me are and that influences me to do the
same. Rather than judge people, help them. While judging people may make you
feel good and help you to escape your own issues, it’s not an act that is going
to help you live an inspired life.
Judging is taking away some of the power you have within you that could
be used towards far better things such as your purpose. Watch how much you are
judging and try and rein it in a little.
14. Don’t
fall too in love with yourself
Especially once you have had a bit of success it’s easy to become
obsessed with how good you are. Lighten up a bit and put your ego to the side.
It’s nice that you can achieve some cool stuff, but don’t let it consume you.
You’re another human being just like me and while you are special in your
own way, we’re all kind of the same in the end. Spread your success around
rather than become focused on how good you are. No one likes a person who is
over the top about their own success.
